mrvette
Phantom of the Opera
Texas Declares War on the USA
President Barack Obama was in the Oval Office when his
telephone rang.
"Hello, President Obama" a heavily accented southern voice said.
"This is Archie, down here at Goliad Texas, I am callin' to tell
ya'll that we are officially declaring war on ya!"
"Well Archie," Barack replied, "This is indeed important news!
How big is your army?"
"Right now," said Archie, after a moments calculation "there is
myself, my cousin Harold, my next-door-neighbor Randy, and
the whole dart team from the local VA Lodge. That makes eight!"
Barack paused. "I must tell you Archie that I have one million
men in my army waiting to move on my command."
"Wow," said Archie. "I'll have at call ya back!"
Sure enough, the next day, Archie called again. " Mr. Obama,
the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry
equipment!"
"And what equipment would that be Archie?" Barack asked.
"Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Harry's
John Deere tractor."
President Obama sighed. "I must tell you Archie, that I have
16,000 tanks and 14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also
I've increased my army to one and a half million since we
last spoke."
"Lord above", said Archie, "I'll be getting back to ya."
Sure enough, Archie rang again about twenty minutes later..
"President Obama , the war is still on! We have managed
to git ourselves airborne! We up an' modified Harolds's
ultra-light with a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four
boys from the Legion have joined us as well!"
Barack was silent for a minute then cleared his throat. "I
must tell you Archie that I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000
fighter planes. My military complex is surrounded by
laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last
spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!"
"Well, nuts," said Archie, "l'll have at call you back."
Sure enough, Archie called again the next day. "President
Obama! I am sorry to have to tell you that we have had
to call off this here war."
"I'm sorry to hear that" said Barack . "Why the sudden
change of heart?"
Well, sir," said Archie, "we've all sat ourselves down and
had a long chat over a few beers, and come to realize that
there's just no way we can feed two million prisoners.."
TEXAS CONFIDENCE CANNOT BE SHAKEN
President Barack Obama was in the Oval Office when his
telephone rang.
"Hello, President Obama" a heavily accented southern voice said.
"This is Archie, down here at Goliad Texas, I am callin' to tell
ya'll that we are officially declaring war on ya!"
"Well Archie," Barack replied, "This is indeed important news!
How big is your army?"
"Right now," said Archie, after a moments calculation "there is
myself, my cousin Harold, my next-door-neighbor Randy, and
the whole dart team from the local VA Lodge. That makes eight!"
Barack paused. "I must tell you Archie that I have one million
men in my army waiting to move on my command."
"Wow," said Archie. "I'll have at call ya back!"
Sure enough, the next day, Archie called again. " Mr. Obama,
the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry
equipment!"
"And what equipment would that be Archie?" Barack asked.
"Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Harry's
John Deere tractor."
President Obama sighed. "I must tell you Archie, that I have
16,000 tanks and 14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also
I've increased my army to one and a half million since we
last spoke."
"Lord above", said Archie, "I'll be getting back to ya."
Sure enough, Archie rang again about twenty minutes later..
"President Obama , the war is still on! We have managed
to git ourselves airborne! We up an' modified Harolds's
ultra-light with a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four
boys from the Legion have joined us as well!"
Barack was silent for a minute then cleared his throat. "I
must tell you Archie that I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000
fighter planes. My military complex is surrounded by
laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last
spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!"
"Well, nuts," said Archie, "l'll have at call you back."
Sure enough, Archie called again the next day. "President
Obama! I am sorry to have to tell you that we have had
to call off this here war."
"I'm sorry to hear that" said Barack . "Why the sudden
change of heart?"
Well, sir," said Archie, "we've all sat ourselves down and
had a long chat over a few beers, and come to realize that
there's just no way we can feed two million prisoners.."
TEXAS CONFIDENCE CANNOT BE SHAKEN
